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Old People
Thursday, 17th February 2011 20:51 PM
The recent health service ombudsman report on care for the elderly has lead to some comment in the media. It is shocking that the old are left uncared for in the very places that are intended to provide care. The NHS says it will institute changes to prevent these inhumanities but this is surely a symptom of a deeper problem.
It may be simplistic to think of the frail elderly as being as children, but at the end of life many are as dependent as new born children. But our reaction is different, a nurse would not dream of leaving a baby in distress but clearly many have this attitude to their elderly patients. Why is this? A child is an affirmation of life while the frail old are an intimation of mortality. Children are the centre of the family while the old are hidden away in homes. These may be two possible reasons.
I’m not a great fan of “Thought for the Day” on radio 4, I usually find it rather contrived. However I would recommend listening to Angela Tilby’s contribution today. In it she says that we are frightened of the sickness and weakness of the elderly and would rather look away, seeing the degeneration of the body and loss of mind hurts us, so we react against it. She suggests that what is needed is a preparation for death so that we can spiritually come to terms with our own mortality. This is not just for the old, it may be too late then, but for the young. Learning to overcome our own fears of decline and death civilises us so we are more able to help the old through that time.
How have we become so detached from the process of ageing and death? I suppose society puts an emphasis on youth, good looks and vitality, it’s good for marketing! But also the increased mobility of our society and the decline of the extended family means that the old do not stay within the family. In “less developed (haha)” counties the old are looked after within the family. Their decline is evident to young and old alike, but is treated as part of life and death.
We have lost this connection with the old so we do not, as Angela Tilby puts it, spiritually come to terms with our own mortality.